NOTE: The following links on twin-flames have been referred to in this article. The readers who are new on this path, may check them first to get a proper background of what is being discussed here:
Well, that title has been borrowed from this write-up I came across, a few weeks ago. But yeah, I started to vaguely understand, during late 2013 I guess, that there is no proverbial light at the end of the path I'm walking and that it just started to mirror my own Karma, I've committed till then. But then, I don't think I have put this piece of wisdom to use consciously. I was perhaps just responding to events as they unfolded.
Anyway...now this post itself has been triggered by the need I sense, to clarify certain aspects of twin-flame relationships. What drives me to write this is -- the turmoil happening all around the world in the name of Twin Flames and the enormous suffering thousands (or perhaps even lakhs) of twin flames are undergoing. Well, I have not met any of them in person, it's Internet that makes me aware of this suffering. For instance, this specific post with 108 (and counting) replies, which I skimmed through briefly.
Well, the news is that I'm NOT going to present you with any revelations or advice that will somehow magically solve all the drama and dilemma going on. You all know it's not possible for some magical piece of wisdom to cure all the emotinal dilemma. So, no solace or respite as such. But, I do want to present you with some bitter truth.
I'm a twin flame myself and I have been on both sides of the game. Well, that's only in hindsight and I did not do any of that running/chasing/waiting thing consciously when I actually did it. Infact neither my twin-flame nor myself did much of explicit running or chasing, so it might be right to say that we just left each other to the mercy of one's own. I've come to know about "Twin Flames" as a concept and a process that is happening around the globe after I've been through a fair share of the connection myself...after I already played my part with both the roles...and after touching upon as many stages as possible in a relatively short time. There, one might term me 'ignorant' of Internet. But atleast here, ignorance turns out to be a bliss for me. The awareness was just dormant in me for a while...I've joined this walk relatively late, compared to the world around. But, that's only in this current life time. I know that I've been through this a number of times before and that I'm only experiencing the consolidated phase of it now. So that way, I've been able to experience a fair share of my life "being" purely in the human realm within the boundaries of current lifetime alone and that grounding definitely helps! Luckily, I've come to know of the techincalities of this concept, when I was almost coming to terms with the fact that this is a difficult journey ahead and is going to take time...how much 'time'? We never know!
So, I'm not here to offer any expert advice on how to go about it. I myself don't know. But we all do know that every twin-flame journey is unique and each of the twin-flame couples is at a different point in that cosmic journey. Given the complexity of the topic, I don't even know where to start. There are so many questions twin flames are facing currently - like, "Until when should I wait?", "Are twin flames bound to re-unite?" "Is the reunion guaranteed to happen in this very lifetime?" "If there is no guarantee, then why the hell does God/Universe put me through this suffering?" and oh so many more.
To answer these questions, there is a lot of advice online, spanning across a wide spectrum between extreme ends...like ranging from this one where there is a clear-cut advice that (the apparently) more-aware person has to wait, to the one where one is asked to shun off the twin-flame who does not express any concern towards their counterpart's existence. Ofcourse, there is always a middle path wherein people wait, work on it as much as their tolerance allows them to, check how destiny unfolds and then decide. Perhaps, this middle path is what most of us take. But then, there comes a time when one runs out of patience and has to decide either way or just plain die at all levels. At such a point, I find myself more or less agreeing with the latter end of the advice -- nothing in this world, not even twin-flame connection, needs to be strived for, at the cost of yourself, when that something is cutting across the core of yourself - your fundamentals that make you. One need not torment oneself waiting for the twin flame counterpart to turn up. It's a belief I have arrived at, the knowing of it wasn't there from the beginning itself. Though a fair share of that torment is unavoidable for the humans we are, we must by all means help ourselves by being easy on our ownselves first.
I don't intend to touch upon all aspects of it because I'm not qualified for it in the first place. But, I shall write about two aspects of it, which I'm clear about:
- Lessons to be learnt.
- Who are twin flames?
Lessons to be learnt:
There is this growing idea that is echoed at various places on the Internet - "If your twin flame has not yet turned up after going away from you, then you have lessons to learn. Keep focusing on your spiritual growth!" Thank God, I ran into this idea only a few months ago, when I'm more or less clear about how to go about my path. It is definitely a well meant keen advice, but I'm afraid it might sometimes throw the waiting twin-flame into a much deeper abyss.
Ofcourse, we have lessons to learn! Who doesn't have? All couples, twin flames or non-twin flames alike, have lessons to learn. Infact a couple has MORE lessons to learn after coming together, on how to lead the good life, by exploring each other, by working on their equation with the society. And come to think of that phase when a couple forays into parenthood! That is going to be a whole new world for them and they will have lessons to learn constantly.
Which God ever said that you should learn all the necessary lessons before coming together itself? Life is too short to spend more than half of it learning about love, instead of living and experiencing it out! Life is too precious to spend decades waiting for unrequited love* (See Footnotes ). Really, it feels so painful to see couples waiting for decades to hear from their supposed twin-flame counterparts.
And now, let me drive this point clear. I'm NOT saying you should get married and settle down in life even if you don't find the right (compatible, at-par or whatever) partner. I'm NOT saying you should not work on love and spiritual growth. I'm aware that sometimes people just don't want to get married and would want to work on other aspects of life - be it getting rich, serving society or working on the spiritual front. I'm also aware that some people are very very clear about the person in their life and they are ready to wait for them at the cost of everything. (If you are really that clear, then ofcourse you wouldn't need any advice/help in the first place, nobody can ever stop you from waiting for your love). What I AM saying is - if you are keen on marriage and family, do NOT waste decades of your life waiting on ambiguous and unrequited love. Find a closure somehow. Do yourselves that favour, you deserve it by all means.
If you love a person, it doesn't necessiate that he/she must love you back, even if you believe you just know deep down your heart that he/she is your twin flame. It is possible that the two of you are at different levels of awareness and evolution. One might be aware of the connection and the other might not be. Ofcourse, it takes time for us to understand this, but it is important that we understand this loud and clear. And there's this another possibility wherein both of you are aware, but both of you have different expectations from the connection. Your goalposts in this journey might completely differ and then so will your checkposts. So, it is only natural that one of you denies or repels the other. I think, it is the second scenario which is quite tricky. (Ofcourse, there is a third possibility of false twin-flames, but I don't intend to cover that here.)
So, how does one deal with such a tricky scenario? To reiterate, here we are dealing with that scenario wherein you are sure that your twin flame counterpart IS aware of the connection, but yet doesn't respond for years. It is completely understandable that when one of the two is NOT aware of the connection, there is not much scope for discussion. But when both of you are aware of the connection and when a few years of life have already gone by trying to understand this, it is going to be very painful when one of the twin-flames totally shuts down the communication with the other* (See Footnotes ). There are numerous blogs which cover both aspects of runner-chaser dynamic, so I don't need to cover that part of it here. People are well aware of this dynamics already. All one might just want to know is, how to break free of this cycle.
So, by this time we know that the runner has his/her reasons to run and the chaser has his/her reasons to chase and both have their own reasons to wait/not wait for the other. There's no debate about it and there is a good level of agreement about this on Internet already. The task at hand is to find out how to break free of this cycle and find some peace in life - with or without this twin-flame connection reaching its fulfillment. So please consider re-prioritizing your priorities if you haven't already. The goal here is NOT to re-unite with your twin-flame come whatever may, but to balance yourself after (and through) this life-changing process and have some peace in life. A real twin-flame would always think that it would be just great to re-unite with one's twin flame, but the bitter truth I alluded you to, at the beginning of this post is this - it is NOT mandatory that all twin-flames must re-unite. (We will see why, in the next part - "Who are twin flames?", but for now let's not lose track of our goal - how to break-free of this cycle of running-chasing-waiting.)
I guess only chasers (or to be more precise, 'waiters' - whosoever is waiting to listen from the other) would be able to relate with the current solution being proposed. That was my last role, so I only know how a chaser would be able to break free of it. I don't know what the runner (or the one who is not responding) must do. But I'd believe that once, one of the twin flames succeeds to break free of that cycle, then the cycle breaks at the other end too pertaining to the inevitable work done at the other end. So, maybe it would be right to say that this cycle breaks owing to the work of the both, but done without each other's knowledge.
The goal here is to bring about a convergence between your spiritual realm and physical realm. If your twin-flame is responding to you after many years of work on your self, then that's good (infact awesome, as that is all you have been asking for) and the spiritual relationship between both of you will only amplify the happiness and peace in life. But then we are talking about that case wherein you just don't know what your twin-flame counterpart is upto, when you have not been hearing them for years. In such a case, you do that to them on the spiritual plane, what they have done to you on the physical plane. Yes, they have shut you down on the physical plane, so you shut them down on the spiritual plane. And whether or not to re-unite in the physical plane, you deal with that in the physical plane itself! Trust and open communication lie at the heart of love. When there is deceit and manipulation, it is not love anymore, it becomes business. Yes, when you are able to successfully shut down the spiritual connection with your twin flame, you will get the clarity and strength needed to deal with the connection. Either you will have the courage to re-initiate the communication and create the scope to talk it out with them again or you will have the courage and peace to call the relationship off. If you give yourselves that closure, that's quite enough, it need not involve the partner who is not willing to talk about it openly.
Coming to the work I did on the astral plane so far, a part of it went into awakening and understanding the Karma that elapsed between me and my twin flame. But a significant part of it went into shutting down the connection. Initially I did not even understand what was happening. But as I meditated more and more and got in tune with my higher self, I understood that my higher self has been working for a long time through my past lives on shutting down the spiritual connection with him.
So, to summarize, if your twin flame doesn't turn up yet, after years of separation, it doesn't mean you have more lessons to learn down the path or have to do more spiritual growth, but it might just mean that you yourself need to
severe sever (Typo! ;-) Checked and corrected it on April 16, 2017!) those spiritual chords with him/her. The only hard lesson you might have to learn is that you don't need this and that you might have to switch to a path with fewer sensible lessons. And when you do cut those chords down, cut them clean, bring out your stubborn, affirmative or even your cruel side there, if need be. Later, you will only be glad that you did!
The shutting down of spiritual connection with your twin-flame is NOT as such the end of the relationship between you and your twin flame!! To understand that we need to understand who twin flames are and on what mission they are now on earth. Let's take a look at that now!
Who are twin flames?
I'm NOT inclined to agree with this predominant online definition that twin flames are two bodies of the same soul, that they were initially one and then they split into two. Infact, it is the Universe as a whole which is so. The Universe as a whole is a Twin Flame. Here is how my understanding goes. This is the knowing/revelation I experienced through my Awakening process and I don't have the faintest of doubt of whether or not it is right. It is absolutely right for me* (See Footnotes ). But I do not claim the same correctness for others.
The Universe is in an eternal dance of fission and fusion of its twin/complementary aspects - That which IS and that which ISN'T! These two twin aspects can be equated to Energy and Consciousness or Feminine and Masculine aspects of the Universe respectively. During the fission, the first beings that came into existence are God and Goddess. Goddess is "That which IS" and God is "That which ISN'T". They are the first couple of the Universe. Since God is "That which ISN'T" we can say that eternally it is God who exists when the Universe is in an infinite state of nothingness. The paradox is "That which ISN'T" is That which IS eternal.
As the Universe expands through the dance between Consciousness and Energy, we see matter and void growing. The more the matter, the more (infact exponentially more) the void. The more the growth, the more the disorder. The more the galaxies and planets, the more the dark matter. After as much as growth is possible, there comes a time when the disorder that has been triggered by the growth is no more containable. It can no more be contained. (The Second Law of Thermodynamics - Law of Entropy - is the closest piece in Science that explains this process). That is when the Universe needs the fusion of its two aspects again so as to balance each other and hence keep the Universe in balance. If that fusion doesn't happen, it goes back to its state of nothingness. And after that, when that nothingness can no more be contained, it undergoes fission yet again as if the Universe has started all over again. But the intention of God and Goddess is to NOT allow such intermediate state of nothingness, but instead maintain a continuous sequence of fission and fusion. That is when they fulfill their role of keeping the Universe intact.
Now, look into the first sentence of the previous para a bit more deeply. It reads - "the dance between the Energy and the Consciousness", NOT - "the dance between the God and the Goddess". After the fission of the Universe, the God and Goddess split themselves into three couples - the couples who are responsible for the three fundamental aspects required for the functioning of the Universe - Creation, Maintenance and Destruction & Restoration. And these couples of Trinity who have been guarding the aspects of Mind, Body and Soul respectively, have taken the Universe forward. And their progeny constitutes the Cosmic Beings. Now, this aspect of Trinity though was realized through my Awakening process, I attribute my knowledge of Hinduism to have made me arrive at this understanding much easily. Anyway, the couples of Trinity are not too important in this context and you may just choose to ignore this concept for now. The idea that the Universe progressed ahead through God and Goddess would suffice. The human beings here on Earth, or for that matter, beings on any planet, are but cells of one of those Cosmic Beings. Life on every planet is guarded by a couple and different couples might guard it at different points of time.
So, in that sense, the expression of love between a man and a woman on Earth is also part of that 'dance between the Energy and the Consciousness'. This periodic occurrence of fission and fusion happens through Cosmic Cycles. Just as the Universe goes through a Cosmic Cycle, every system, big and small, has similar Cycles to go through, it's just that the periodicity differs with the scale of the system. Our Milky Way too has to go through them and so does our Earth. The process wherein such fission and fusion happen at the scale of the Earth is termed as "Precession of Equinoxes" (let's refer to it as PoE hereon).
Now, let's keep the Universe aside for some time and talk about our Earth alone. Before PoE is supposed to happen for Earth, the couple who is guarding life on Earth performs Saadhana (in this context, it means Cosmic Meditiation) to balance the Karma of the Planet and its Humanity. Saadhana is started well ahead (atleast 2-3 ages before the expected time of PoE, depending on the status of Karma) to allow enough time for preparation. Let me term the couple as the "Sustenance Couple" for it is They who work for the Sustenance of life on Earth. They can be considered as the God and Goddess for Earth, for it is through them that all life here receives the aspects/energies of Trinity (Mind, Body and Soul). Ofcourse, parts of the energies can also be contributed by other Cosmic Beings (Deities), but it is this couple which is responsible to take care of all life, at the end of the day. It means, as life progresses here on Earth, there is a collective Feminine aspect and a Masculine aspect woven continuously and those aspects are borne by the Sustenance Couple to balance the Karma. This is to keep the planet and its life in balance when it undergoes PoE.
But as it is said, Karma is a beasty bitch! It is not so easy to balance it. During the Saadhana for the current cycle of PoE, be it due to some dark forces or be it due to the inherent complexity of the process itself, an unfortunate series of events transpired and the Sustenance Couple ended up in incompatible roles. They ended up being in such a state that longer the Saadhana, the longer the unresolved Karma. Thus, the unfortunate Cosmic Error that creeped in (or was triggered) implies that it made the collective Masculine and Feminine pull away from each other and go on divergent paths. Since their Cosmic States were corrupted, the couple had to resort to the alternative of doing the work on Earth itself in the confines of their human selves. It means their work has shifted from the spiritual dimension to the earthern (physical) dimension. Rather, it would be right to say that they continued to do the spiritual work from the physical dimension to sort out that incompatibility. This shift happened approximately some 2500 years (earth-years) ago.
During such outliers, the work is delegated to other couples too (who are very much part of the Sustenance Couple), instead of confining it to the Sustenance Couple alone (very natural since the Sustenance Couple itself is not in its highest state possible). It is pretty similar to this case - when you have very less stress, every cell of your body is pretty much in a good state and is in sync with the master of the body and requires less work (meditation or whatever) to recharge it. The higher the stress, the higher the explicit work (more meditation, more medicines, exercise, counselling etc) needed on each and every cell to sync them with the master. It is when the work load is high or when there is an emergency or an external aggression, that certain parts of the body are explicitly triggered into action (let's just say White Blood Corpuscles :-)).
These couples who have taken the responsibility of playing their part in balancing the collective Karma are exactly those twin-flames, as we are referring them to, today. Infact, no couple is a twin flame as such. Not even the God and the Goddess! But the God and Goddess bear the Twin-Flame aspects of the Universe. And so is the Sustenance Couple bearing the twin-flame aspects of the Earth. Every system which is a whole, every living system, is a reflection of the Universe and inherently has twin-flame aspects within itself. It is the constitution of twin-flame aspects that makes it a whole. Any system created or randomly evolved, even a chaotic system (be it a system in chaos or a system born out of a chaos) inherently churns twin-flame aspects as it sustains to continue as a whole. It is when the twin-flame aspect goes out of balance to the extent it breaks off, that the system ceases to exist...as a Whole. It needs something else to complete it then.
A human being, as a perfect system who is a whole in oneself, is also the reflection of the Universe and has twin-flame aspects within oneself. Both the God and Goddess are in unison in a human being and when they unite in perfect balance, the person is in a perfect state of peace and happiness. Infact, by default the God and Goddess are already in balance in each and everyone of us when we are born, but as we evolve, their aspects go out of balance. The God and Goddess are the couple closest to the source and hence for the rest of the Universe, They Are the Source! In that sense, it can be said that the Universe in its material form is the Goddess Herself, but Her Soul is the God. It is only but natural that there is no other couple that is "capable" of balancing the collective Karma of the Universe. The fission and fusion of the Universe, when brought down to the scale of a human being is this - the soul leaving the body time and again and entering a fresh body so as to allow the eternal journey of the soul!
In a similar sense, the collective Karma of the planet and humanity can only be balanced by the Sustenance Couple. But then, each of the twin-flame couples are indeed contributing to a significant part in enabling the Sustenance Couple balance it. Again, it is the Cell-Body (Part & Whole) analogy! One cannot say "cells" are less important, because if they don't function (or function erratically like in Cancer), the Body can't function. At the same time, there has to be a master for the body to govern the cells of the body. So every part of the Universe is indeed contributing to the progress of the Universe in an important way in its own capacity owing to its scale.
To summarize, twin-flame couples are those couples who chose to take part in the dance of the Twin-Flame aspects of Earth to allow the execution of PoE event in a best possible way. Those couples DO have some self-interests here. No other work would place them on a faster course to ascension of their soul than taking part in the twin-flame dance. So that must really answer the question - "Why the hell does God/Universe put me through this suffering, when there is no guarantee of reunion?" They all made a conscious choice to participate, so it is only natural for the God/Universe to remind them of their mission whenever they are swaying away from it. For a person, there is no bigger God in this Universe than one's own soul and that soul has been yearning to evolve and ascend fast. It has taken up some tough challenges, set some tough goals for itself, so it is only natural that twin-flame couples are going through enormous pain to accomplish such tougher goals. It is said, God chooses the toughest of his soldiers for the toughest of his battles, so know that you are one of them.
Reversal of cause and effect:
Now, there is this notion that the runner is running because he/she is facing his/her inner demons, fears etc, that it is what makes them run, widening the twin-flame gap to the extent that the ego dies and then someday they will return when they can heal those inner wounds. This is not really true. The inner demons and fears are not "causing" the runner to run and leading to more incompatibility. It is the otherway round. The initial cosmic twin-flame incompatibility (triggered by the cosmic error) is what is causing the runner to run. The running is "causing" the inner demons and fears to surface up. The runner is facing inner demons and fears because he/she is running far away from himself/herself. So basically the effects of running are being seen as the causes of running. Because of this, we are trying to heal the wrong wounds. Understanding the problem is half of the solution. The cause of running is plain and simple - the initial incompatibility between the feminine and the masculine - the tendency of divergence which initiated this work by the couples in the first place.
Give this a bit more thought! Haven't we all seen people marrying early in life and growing and learning together and leading a happy life? Is it forbidden for learning to happen when a couple is together? If a twin flame is able to stay in a relationship/marriage with a non-twin-flame without having to face his/her fears, then why is it getting difficult for twin-flames to stay in a relationship/marriage? It is because there is unresolved Karma between them and they cannot unite before that is resolved.
The story of the Sustenance Couple is intertwined in the story of each and every twin-flame couple. Since the story is intertwined, so are the errors of the Cosmic Play. We see that twin-flames invariably go through multiple relationships. Sometimes (infact most of the times), we see them getting married to a person who is not their twin-flame either because they do NOT have the awareness of their connection or even if they do have the awareness, they are not sure how to go about it. These multiple relationships are being perceived on the Internet as a platform for preparation for the real Twin-Flame relationship ahead or as a platform to clear off the Karma. This is again completely untrue! It is not God's way of preparing a couple for marriage, trust me! In a given life time, you don't need to learn how to lead a marriage/relationship from a random partner and then live it out seriously with a twin-flame partner. This is completely ridiculous. The multiple relationships are nothing but a spill-over of the cosmic incompatibility and error. (But remember that the Sustenance Couple did not progress further on the spiritual plane after the error, because if they do, it means they are performing the dance with incompatible roles and are on their way to nurture more and more unresolved Karma. So basically they have rejected such a path of incompatibility outrightly by shifting to the physical plane). The lives here are only a reflection of the cosmic play, so the errors have just spilled over into human plane. This is inevitable, hence the multiple relationships are inevitable in a way, but as one gets more and more aware, one will be able to reject the incompatible relationships. One will be able to stop such relationships from happening in their lives. But again, it depends on how (and when) the cosmic error is playing itself out in each and every twin-flame relationship. The multiple relationships are like those mistakes in the short-run, we discussed before. They are our fall-back mechanisms when cringing for stability.
Ideally (and that is ideally!), once a couple is initiated on the twin-flame connection, it must happen only between those two. There is NO ROOM for multiple connections. (I read about multiple connections on internet, but unfortunately that saps off the emotional energies of your higher self). Ideally, only a couple who is married (in the real sense of marriage) treads the path of twin-flame connection, because they are committed to each other and are ready to support each other on this journey. That is how the deities have been performing the Saadhana. The couple must actually agree with each other on the process they intend to follow, to balance the Karma. Atleast the key parts of it. But unfortunately, currently that is not the case and this is happening in its most adhoc way. Forget about marriage and commitment, people are not even communicating.
Why and how should one shut down the spiritual connection?
At the beginning of this article, I proposed a solution that to break free of the twin-flame cycle, you must try to bring about a convergence between spiritual realm and physical realm. It means that, if you have done enough work and are either hopeful or seeing clear signs of your twin-flame reunion, you can actually continue your spiritual relationship. But I'd guess, that such couples who are already seeing/have already seen positive signs of reunion are only 5% of the twin-flame couples on Earth. The rest of them are still (or have been) grappling with this dilemma of how the relationship on spiritual plane and physical plane can be so starkly opposite. This is the subject under discussion here, so it is they who must shut down the connection. I outrightly said that the connection must be shutdown, but we did not discuss why. Let's see now, why it must be shut down.
Eitherway, it is to bring about a convergence between spiritual and physical realms. If it is working in the physical plane, make it work on the spiritual plane. If it isn't, on the physical plane, then don't make it work on the spiritual plane. If you still try to make it work on the spiritual plane despite no signs in the physical plane, it only amounts to increasing the divergence. You are either stuck with your own past or future self that way. Currently when you are not really on a favourable ride with your counterpart and if in the spiritual plane you are, doesn't it mean that the spiritual plane is nowhere near your present tense? (Time w.r.t physical plane!) So, you are only prolonging the process and delaying your reunion by living with your future self or indulging in your past self. For brief periods, that's fine since you need to understand how to go about it, but for prolonged periods, this is NOT suggested. The idea is to pull yourself more into the 'now' timeframe. That way, if not in this lifetime, atleast in a couple of future lifetimes you will be able to thrust your path to that of convergence. (I say that only to be technically right, but I'm hopeful that we are going to succeed in this lifetime itself!) In either case, it is NOT the end of the roads for twin-flames. When the spiritual roads are closed, the roads do open up on Earth.
Since, we have already understood who twin flames are, let's try to look at this dance from both the ends. After the error, this is the state of collective Masculine and Feminine of Earth - It is as though they are facing away from each other but each of them is facing a mirror, a reflection of their own self. This shall be the case until that error is rectified. And to rectify that error, there must be a convergence between spiritual and physical realms. Infact the Masculine and Feminine have swapped their roles after the error. So whatever treatment you are receiving from your twin-flame now is mostly how you have treated them earlier! How long can one indulge in the reflection of one's own self? Just think about it, infinite reflection of our own self, within our own self! That is going to be crazy! But that is the destination such a divergence leads us to. So, we must break that as soon as possible. The real crux of the problem is that, the guidance has been diametrically opposite to the counterparts of the twin-flame connection. One end of the twin-flames has been receiving guidance to nurture the relationship on spiritual plane and the other end of the guidance is that they must try to nurture the relationship on the physical plane. Typically, the former end is the man and the latter end is the woman. This is only to bring about a balance of both the planes. So neither of them is at fault. Blame the Gods and your own higher selves for crafting such a plan where you are being asked to converge from the swinging extreme ends. The reality is that such is the current burden of Karma that needs to be resolved and once you realize this, you will understand what a magnificent role you have been playing all along!!!
The good news here is that our higher selves* (See Footnotes ) have already completed the needed work on the astral plane. If you do enough work to tune yourself to your higher self, you can instantly do the needful of you - as if just downloading a package from internet and installing it on your system! It's really that simple! Coming to the 'how' part of it - you must be really clear that you don't intend to deal with the stream of energy and consciousness anymore now that you know that you are receiving more and more of it due to an error. Once you instill this awareness, the dance changes and so shall the patterns of energy and consciousness within you.
Shutting down doesn't ofcourse happen in a second or a day, you must still deal with streams of energy and consciousness, but in a different way. It is with an intention to reduce them instead of indulging in them and accepting more of the streams. You will receive the needed inner guidance on how to deal with the streams, as you flip your stand. Whatever guidance I received, is on my blog. You can no more choose to remain an observer and let the dance happen as it is happening (though a bit of an observer state is needed, being in that state always doesn't help much). You must by all means swing into action and NOT remain an observer, because you have to own up your responsibilities (for you too have contributed to this amplification of Karma) and fight your own battles. Good luck to all of you with that! :-)
Once the connection is shut-down, it feels as though a spell that has been cast so far on you, has just been taken off you. It is a very peaceful state, I'm in it now, so I know it. With that clear mind and soul, the twin-flame couple understands that they are a couple who were once in love either on the astral plane or earthly dimensions and have been through a twin-flame connection. They might still be in love, but it's for them to check and decide how to go about it. If they are not really interested in each other now, they can just go about their own paths (but this is usually weird and rare because if twin-flame connection cannot make you fall in love, then what else can? But if earth has evolved so much, that it is out of alignment with the Source, then one of the twin-flames might not be just that much into the other!). But if it's otherwise, then they will have the courage to materialize their long ill-fated relationship. But the bottom line is that, one need not enter into a relationship with a person for the sole reason that he/she has been their counterpart in the twin-flame dance. (Again, that's a real outlier case, but still possible, so I'm just writing it to be technically right and complete!) This holds good even for the Sustenance Couple themselves, in which case a different Couple will be assigned the responsibility of guarding life on Earth.
I don't know if this write-up is going to be helpful to anybody at all. But as I wrote it, I found myself getting into more and more harmony with the environment around me, so I see that the main purpose of it is fulfilled. Thanks for reading through, if you have actually come this far.
* Why should anybody victimize oneself to unrequited love, even after being touched by the Divine in a unique way? Unrequited love makes one obsessive, weak and forget one's own self-worth, ofcourse at the end it might make one stronger than ever. But if you allow it to, it might push you to a point of return! You can never be the same. Ofcourse, no one is ever the same after being in love, but if you ask people to choose only one aspect from a hundred, I'd guess most of them would choose "Passion for Life", atleast I would. Unrequited love can push you to that point of no return where you no more are the same passionate self. So please do not let that passion in you die, you have so much more to do! Unrequited love can sap off and kill years from your life, but know that the person keeping you at bay has his/her reasons after all...even if you are taken over by an overwhelming sense of love. Infact, if they too did, they would reciprocate, wouldn't they? Sometimes, unfortunately years of life are wasted (or maybe not) when all that was needed was a 10-minute frank conversation between two aware and responsible adults leading to a closure. Ofcourse, it is often easier said than done, especially in twin-flame connections.
 Infact that phase where in the aware twin-flame waits on the unaware twin-flame (the twin-flame who is totally unaware of the connection) in the assumption that their counterpart might be aware of it, might be even more painful. But again, I don't cover that case here. Perhaps most of the twin-flames have already crossed this barrier so mostly both are aware by this time.
 When I say it is absolutely right for me, I mean I don't feel like analyzing if it is right or wrong. It is like the fact I've come to know from the Source and I don't doubt the 'source' of that information. So it is merely the awareness of a fact for me. Even if somebody comes along and asks - "How do you know it's true? Maybe it isn't?", I don't feel like answering them with - "Maybe!" And here is a disclaimer for the so-called Skeptics, just in case they bump into this content (owing to the phrase "Skeptics" in this blogpost, hehe, although it is highly unlikely they do, because my experience from a discussion with Skeptics group on Goodreads is that Skeptics do not understand Mysticism, do not need Mysticism and hence are not in search of it. So it is highly unlikely that they search for content on 'Twin Flames' because after all TWIN-FLAMES are MYSTIC, aren't they?) - I'm not asking anybody here to buy my truth, so I don't have any responsibility to prove that it is your truth too. Well, truth is truth, but it can be interpreted differently by different people, so that is when things like 'your truth', 'my truth', 'your reality', 'my reality' pop up. And when truth itself has multiple interpretations, why not Science? So that's how we have 'your science' and 'my science'!
 When I say higher selves, I don't mean that we are lower selves or something. The higher selves have access to higher dimensions of the Universe and guide us while we are on our travails on Earth within the constraints of human existence. Each of us has a higher existence and taking that a bit ahead, the Sustenance Couple represent our higher selves and taking that further ahead, the God and Goddess represent our highest selves possible. The higher self is termed 'higher' because it is 'higher' in scale and hence naturally has higher capacities.....and higher responsibilities or even higher burden too!